Learn Why Emotional Connection Is Imperative For Healthy Relationship:
So you may be saying to your self “really?” Why is emotional connection so important? You're not alone. Most people have no clue why emotional connection is so important to making love last.
We are talking about love here, not simply avoiding divorce. We all know of couples who are not close and may fight like crazy but don’t get divorced. They may learn to stay in the same house without fighting by disconnecting and having parallel lives
When it comes to lifetime love there is no way around the importance of being emotionally connected. While love is “more than a feeling” (thanks to Boston for that line) no one will tell you that you can stay in love without feeling.
Just in the last 15 years science has advanced quickly in its understanding of how to make love last. The problem is that the popular books on this topic are just now starting to catch up with the science.
In fact the new science of attachment informs us that our brains get wired to emotionally connect in our first two years of life. It is our first attachment relationship, usually with mother, that teaches us how to be emotionally connected. About half of us learn how to be secure in our emotional connection and the other half learn how to be insecure.
It’s interesting how this correlates with the 50% divorce rate.
So yes, the unfair truth is that many of us enter relationship with a big disadvantage. We bring the emotional insecurity we developed in childhood into our adult love relationships. Even if we had an emotionally secure childhood, there is a good chance we will marry someone who has not had one.
This is why commitment alone will not solve the problem of emotional conflict and eventual relationship failure. Many of us started our relationships primed for failure. We are not secure in expressing our emotions or hearing the heart cries of the person we love.
Here is the really GOOD NEWS . . .We can learn how to rewire our brains and become emotionally secure with the one we love in adult life!